As many of you know I’ve taken up teaching in Thailand.  I had nearly ten months of pure vacation and wanted to give back something more to the community.  Also, after multiple visa fiascos, some soul searching, and deciding that I want to stay on in this country, I’ve found it most useful to have a work permit.

The short of it is that if you decide to work in a country, you can set up and be more productive.  My hope was that by committing to a schedule, I would actually get More work done.

Could it be true?

After four months, I would say Absolutely!  The high-schools here require you to teach about four hours a day.  Because I am now on a routine schedule (after a year of lazing about), I am getting up and getting shit done.

I love the interaction with the kids, have learned far more about the culture, and find myself continually learning from children.

Travel Anywhere…

For their midterm assignment, I decided to give them a trip.  They could go anywhere in the world, bring any amount of money, stay as long as they liked, and study anything while they were there.  The response was amazing. I actually got kids to write paragraphs that had barely been constructing sentences.  But, there were also some ways they used the language that made me laugh or brought tears to my eyes.  It also gave me a whole new appreciation for travel, and I hope these snippets will encourage you too.  I haven’t corrected the English or grammar intentionally, so enjoy!

When given the assignment, Where will you go, How much money will you bring, What will you do, What will you learn… there were some very interesting responses…

I will learn about staying alive.

I will need a lot of money.  I will drink beer every day.

I will enjoy the funny land.

I will learn about culture and experiences that I can’t find in the class.

From the travel, I will have been taught about How do I stay Exciting.

I will go to New Zeland.  I would like to stay with nature and meet sheep.

Oversea can make me have grown up and live in the world with myself.

I will need somewhere for my relaxation.  I would like to touch the wave sound.

The weather will be rainy in July but for me no problem.  This is life.

In The New Year…

Chinese New Year is this weekend.  We put together a wishing tree, full of their wishes, and I wanted to let you know… wherever you are in the world, that YOU are a part of these kid’s wishes.  Here are some below:

I wish that everyone in the world have good health and a perfect life.

I wish everybody good and hope they can have fun.

and from me… I wish that everyone can be HAPPY!

Since it is the New Year, What are Your Travel Plans?  Where will you go?  What will you do?  What do you hope to learn?

Today I am going to share a bit about worry.  From time to time I find myself caught up in the negative cycle of worrying about things, trying to figure out my whole life, and wondering if I am going to be alright in the future.  Worry is a strange machine.  It stops for awhile, then starts back up again, full blast until sometimes it begins to take over completely.

Before I began my latest adventure of moving my business online and heading off to Thailand, I had many worries.  Worries tend to begin as What If’s and are typically future based.

Here were some of my BIG WHAT IF’s:

1. What if I get hurt?
2. What if I run out of money?
3. What if I can’t find a place to live?
4. What if my clients quit and I have no income?

I think most people have these concerns on an ongoing basis.  I think most people worry about the future, and worry about money.  We all seemingly have more than enough TODAY; but what if something happens, and it all goes away tomorrow?

My main purpose for writing this post today is because I think I have gotten to the point where I have had ALL of my worries happen. I’m going to tell a quick tale about each and the lessons that came from them.  My hope is that this post prompts you to look at your biggest worries, and face them head on. If we can learn how to do this on a regular basis, we become less afraid of life.  We can move confidently into the future with less stress and more freedom.

Worry #1:  What if I Get Hurt?

I love motorcycles.  When I was 19, I decided to buy a motorcycle and took a course on how to avoid accidents and handle emergencies.  It was fantastic.  We drove little Suzuki 300 cc motorcycles and whizzed around a parking lot jumping over logs and doing emergency stops.  I loved it!  When I got my bike, it was the real deal.  I loved going for rides, clearing my head, and taking to the long curvy country roads in Indiana.

One time, on my way back home from the lake, my friend and I had a giant Yukon pull out ten feet in front of us.  The girl that was driving obviously didn’t see us but when she did she stopped abruptly and blocked both lanes of traffic.  I had no way of going around her and ten feet of room to stop.  Luckily, because of my class, I knew how to do an emergency stop.  I locked up the breaks, came to a somewhat controlled slide and laid the motorcycle down on its side with very little damage to myself or my passenger.  My heart was pumping.  I somehow picked up my bike (weighing several hundred pounds) and walked it to the side of the road before going over and yelling at the driver.  Then I started to cry.

I’ve been very weary of bikes since then.  I got rid of my bike.  I rarely go on other people’s, not so much because I don’t trust the driver, but the other drivers on the road that just aren’t paying attention.   So, it is safe to say that being in a motorbike accident is one of my biggest fears in the world.

In April, I went flying off the back of my friend’s motorbike. We were rounding a sharp corner and hit sand.  The bike kept going, but we didn’t.  I flew, superman style across the rough rocky and sandy pavement wearing only a very small sundress.  I remember thinking to myself as I was sliding, “Man, this is really going to hurt!”

Immediately, I jumped up, got out of the road and assessed my damage.  I was bleeding everywhere. Most of my skin had black on it and I could see chunks of pavement under my skin.  I was very upset with my friend, mostly because I knew he took the turn too fast.  I had told him another time to slow down and felt like it was really inconsiderate to put me at risk like that.  But somehow I was able to contain myself and keep quiet until I could speak calmly.

Eventually, I broke the silence with, “What did you learn from this?”

“Well, many things.  But mostly, to slow down.  I try to do everything too fast.”

I responded, “Good.  Well, I’m willing to take these scars for your lesson.”

Then I started to cry.

The thing is, I was mostly upset because it had been such a big fear for so long, and now it was happening.  I had wanted to do my best to isolate myself from ever having to go through that kind of pain ever again.  The memory of the last accident was so powerful that I never wanted to have to deal with it, ever… but here is something strange:  I was hurt far worse this time than the previous accident.  The strange thing was, it wasn’t actually That Bad. Yes, it took weeks to heal up and I have scars on my knees, elbows and hand that will be there for life, but it wasn’t That Bad.  It wasn’t as bad as I had imagined it to be for All These Years.  I had built up the fear and the worry to be So Incredibly Huge and the reality was nothing in comparison.

Worry #2:  What if I Run Out of Money?

Ok, so this has happened, too. An emergency border run comes up, a client payment comes through late, an unexpected whatever comes up, and there I’ve been…worrying about money.  What is so strange about money is how much time we spend worrying about it. I think we spend more time worrying about money than anything else.  But in my experience, I have found that something always happens, and everything works out fine.

I was down to No Money. I was sitting in my bungalow, feeling sorry for myself and budgeting my next few meals before my client payments were going to come through.  I remembered that I had carried another wallet when I was living in Bangkok and decided to rummage through my backpack to see if that wallet had any extra change in it.  When I opened it up, there was $5,000 baht just sitting there staring back at me!! This is the equivalent of about $150 US dollars!!  In just one instant, my mood changed, my worry went away, and I knew somebody, somewhere was looking out for me.

Worry #3:  What if I Can’t Find a Place to Live?

I think if we are honest here, when you travel, living situations just sort of happen.  People pop up, a tour bus drops you off somewhere, you meet a new friend, and the next thing you know…your world has changed.  You are living somewhere else.  Just like that.  It’s not like at home, when you have to pack boxes, hire a moving company, and get a U-haul for all your crap.  I’ve changed my plans on a dime, just because something seemed more fun.

I came up to Bangkok for a two week vacation, and have now been here almost two months.  Why?  I started having fun. I have friends here and I’ve bounced around having a great time and now a group of us are looking for a place to live together.  When you are open to new living experiences, and having fun, great things happen.  Right now, I am sitting in an internet café with all my stuff, waiting out the rain.  My friend has gone back to the US and I’m cat sitting for them in the most amazing apartment I have ever seen.

When I was living in Australia, I met a fun group of kids I palled up with and lived with them for awhile.  I was just out of school, doing my teaching practicum and started crashing on their couch.  I became known as “The Poor American that sleeps on our brown couch.”  It was hysterical.  I’ve slept on boats, crashed on couches or floors, camped out, and one time my friend and I got lost, we lit a garbage bin on fire and slept on a pile of mulch. The reality of this is that it is all very funny and each time, I have been more than fine, I’ve been living an incredible life full of fun and adventures.  When it comes down to it, does it really even matter where you sleep?

Worry #4:  What if My Clients Quit, and I Have No Income?

As a business owner, one major fear is having your clients quit.  We ‘future worry’ about ending up in a cardboard box somewhere and not being able to eat.  I know this is silly, but I do this all the time!  I wonder what might happen if everything goes away and I am left with no income.  So here is the thing:  I have lost clients with the economy.  I have had people I love go away because their personal financial situations.  But, when I’ve had this happen, other opportunities have come up!

One of my goals has always been to teach college students.  I applied for teaching opportunities at home, only to find out that they had more than enough professors.  However, a few weeks ago I was expressing my desire to teach and two days later, I was offered a position to teach at a local management university!  I am having so much fun and learning how to teach internationally.  It only takes a few hours out of my week and I have more than enough time to run my business and have a full social life.

If you are reading this, my guess is that you are entrepreneurial and clever. When I ran out of money in Australia, I got creative.  I washed cars at a car lot.  I worked at a historical garden.  I even painted somebody’s boat at a boat yard.  It hasn’t come to that on this trip, but looking back, I had a lot of ingenuity at twenty-two.  I’m sure if it came down to it, I would have more now, because I have more talents and skills than ever before…And So Do You!  So don’t think of all of the What If’s that are holding you back, you are too smart to starve to death.  And, gosh darn it, people like you!

The Moral of My Story:

The moral of my story is this:  at this point, I have had ALL OF MY WORST FEARS AND WORRIES COME TRUE.  But, here is the thing:  I’m just fine.  I’m more than just fine, I’m great.  I’m having the time of my life!!  My world of possibilities has expanded because I no longer fear my worst concerns.  I now know, without a doubt that even the worst possible thing is really not that bad at all.  So get out there and stop worrying about what might happen.  You’ll be amazed by what does!!

As I approached the rock that loomed above me I smiled to myself, “It’s good to be back.” Railey Beach is a world class climbing destination in Thailand and can easily be recognized by the immense limestone outcroppings that dot along the coastline in perfect turquoise water. This distant paradise is one of my favorite places in the world and as I gear up with a group of fellow climbers I am thankful to have the opportunity to be here again.

Climbing is a sport that I have been involved with for a long time. I tried climbing for the first time in college and have climbed on and off for the past seven years. One would think that after seven years I would have some sense of mastery with the sport; but instead, I am continually humbled by the fact that anytime I have some sense of confidence in my ability, I am flung to the ground. Climbing kicks my butt. I think it is for this reason that I am strangely compelled to continue on in my journey in attempt to face my fears, learn new skills, and ascend to new heights.

However, this is never my approach. Because I am an overachiever, I struggle with the learning process that is natural and try to skip past all of the essential stages of being a novice. I want to immediately be great at climbing. This is why, in my enthusiasm, I sauntered up to the Ao Nang Climbing company and explained that I wanted to book a trip with them. I was introduced to Gob, who would be the guide, and explained to him that I had been climbing for about seven years and have even taught climbing before. I told him I’m living here because I want to get back into the sport and I haven’t been in quite some time, but maybe after I got back on track I could help them lead other climbers if they needed someone extra.

Out at the rock, I was suited up with shoes, a harness, and tied in easily into the familiar figure eight knot of the rope. Looking up, it was a difficult climb. I was wondering if maybe Gob had overestimated my ability because I would really liked to have started on something a bit simpler. “Belay on, Climbing” we exchanged and up I went. About half way up I realized that this was not the appropriate climb for me to start on. While I have spent some time on real rock, the bulk of my experience has been in climbing gyms. There is quite a big difference between climbing inside where the holds stick out from a flat surface with neatly marked colored tape and outside where the holds could be anywhere, your grip is not guaranteed and you cannot see your feet. I reached for chalk.

Taking a breath, I regained my senses and pressed on. Finally, I reached the top and was on my way back down. I realized my guide kept yelling something at me and from the height and with the impeding language difference, it was difficult to understand. “CLIP the ROPE,” he was yelling. Oh, great, I cannot just drift merrily down the climb, I now have to clip all of the quickdraws that I followed getting up here. These are carabineers that hook into the bolts in the rock and guide the rope as the climber ascends. However, I have never actually had to re-hook myself upon descent and wasn’t sure I was up to the challenge. I was traversing unsteadily sideways reaching out for the carabineer when I lost my footing entirely and went swinging off of the rock. Caught by my belayer and looking down I impatiently yelled down, “I can’t do it!”

Unsatisfied with my response, I received several more calls to “CLIP the ROPE!” After four more attempts, he finally let me descend and I clipped the remaining two on the way down. I untied, shook out my hands and walked off of the rock.
For my second climb, I got on the one they had set up for first time climbers. Gob states, “You not do this one, its too easy for you.” I am not sure he quite understands that I can’t do the next one up and really could use a confidence booster at this point. I smile and say back, “Other one too hard, need to do this one.”

“Ok,” he replies and I tie in. Thank God I could get on and have a successful time of it. I felt a bit ill from the first experience and needed to regain some sense of my ability, and it worked. I was able to get on the harder climb next.
With some struggling and effort I made my way up my third climb. Learning the type of rock and textures is always an interesting part of climbing on different rock. Because you can climb a variety of rock (granite, volcanic, limestone, sandstone) it is important to learn the different features, textures, and footing that is required in each case. The same rock can have a variance and on this climb it went quickly from big pocket holds to sharp cutting pebbly holds. Making it past the crux, or the hardest part, I was able to ascend to the top. I reached and half jumped with the last bit of effort I had to touch the ring at the top and looked down signaling that I wanted to be lowered.

Gob shouts back, “Touch the RING!”

Oh my God, didn’t he see me? “I DID TOUCH THE RING,” I yelled.

It was like something from Lord of the Rings, ‘Touch the Ring’,’ Don’t Touch The Ring’ – but he wasn’t understanding me ad I was getting very tired of hovering in the air uncomfortably dangling from 50 feet up and Froto was nowhere to be seen. Finally, he allowed me to come down and as I’m on the ground untying my rope, I’m catching disapproving looks. I try to state my case. “I touched at the top, did you not see me?”

Unimpressed, and shaking his head no, he answers, “you not beginner, you can touch ring.”

Oh my God. I then go on to try to explain to him that I’ve actually been injured and am coming back from not climbing, and yes, I did touch the ring. I opt to go to another climb and get belayed from someone a little less relentless. As I watch the other climbers go up and down the routes I’m struck by a feeling I’ve had often when I have climbed. I don’t know if it is just the nature of the sport or the people that are attracted to it, but there is always this unnatural urge to push oneself faster and harder than humanly possible. I really have had to work on this nature of the sport because it is so insatiable– just one more hold, one more throw, one more… and then the next thing you know, you have just one more injury. It is really easy to overextend yourself and have pulled tendons, cracked ribs, and broken limbs. I glance over at Gob, and probably picking up on my insecurities, he says, “Sorry, I didn’t see you touch the ring.”

I nod, “Mai pen rai,” it doesn’t matter. It shouldn’t matter. But somehow it does. I go into my next climb a bit thrown and can’t get up an easy crack problem and decide to come down.

Later, in my room, I sat trying to decipher this feeling that I was carrying around. I’ve had it before and thankfully I have the time here in Thailand to look at my feelings and actions. I have a mix of feelings spinning around ranging from the fact that it is hard for me to just be a participant on trips (I used to lead them) and that I didn’t feel acknowledged by my efforts. Everyone else was getting handshakes, high-fives, and approving words after each climb. I felt like I had let someone down. And somehow, that said, I felt like I had let myself down. But there was no reason to feel that way! I had a wonderful day climbing in my favorite place in the whole world, and then, suddenly it struck me.

I had set the whole thing up. I had started with an inflated ability to assume that I would be good at something I had never tried. Yes, I had been climbing, but not in a long time, and not on this particular rock. I assumed the role of trying to be a super-hero rather than a novice or amateur thereby creating unrealistic expectations from my guide, and for myself. Because I wanted to be good at it, I pumped myself up by sharing my enthusiasm (or goals) with others. This backfired and made me feel performance anxiety and left me wondering, “What if I can’t do this?” In my first attempt, I went Too Big and Too Fast, trying to skip steps and force myself to push through a learning curve. Exhausted, I realized on my second climb I needed to wind back because I was overwhelmed. I was left feeling worried and doubtful. Regaining confidence for my third climb, I was able to go Too Big and Too Fast again, having similar results. By the last climb my head was so distraught with emotions and feeling misunderstood and unsupported, I had completely lost all focus and could not even finish an easy climb. Of course, no one wanted to help me because I had come across as someone who already had it worked out, or could handle it. This was the defeat.

The defeat in the process, or cycle, that I have put myself in has not just happened in climbing. My initial excitement for wanting to become involved and lead, judging myself against super-hero standards, setting unrealistic expectations and subsequently going into periods of fatigue or burnout have all been a part of my overachiever cycle. While my intent is good, the result is that I work twice as hard and feel emotionally spent when I could have saved myself some time and effort.

Saving Yourself From Yourself

While I could have just chalked up this whole experience as something of a fluke, Gob played a perfect role in the perfect lesson I needed to learn. Sometimes we need to recognize our own behaviors so we can get out of our own way. Being a novice, taking things slow, and getting help from others are all very difficult for the single-minded, focused, independent business owners. In my experience (being one, and working with) I have found that most business owners are overachievers. While this drive and super-hero mentality has propelled us into being business owners, we also need to realize when we are setting ourselves up for emotional and productivity roller-coasters.

Here are some tips that I put together after my humbling experience of learning from the rock:

1. Triple the amount of time you think it will take you to do something. This includes learning a new task, a new skill, training someone, implementing a new project, et cetera.
2. Let yourself be a novice. Approach new activities from that angle and allow yourself to be vulnerable and in need of help.
3. Talking yourself into doing something by sharing your goals or knowledge can be interpreted by others that you are the expert. People are less likely to help you if they think you know more about something than them. Instead, allow yourself to experience the learning curve with others.
4. Setting yourself up with unrealistic expectations brings out the judge in others and in yourself. Try setting smaller goals instead and approaching others to help you along the way. Achieving smaller goals will further your success and improve your confidence.
5. Learn that by slowing down, you are actually speeding up your progress. I took the climbs in this order: 2, 1, 4, 3. Had I just gone through 1, 2, 3, 4 I would have finished, felt better, and probably attempted a fifth climb. I also would have had an entirely different experience emotionally which is what is really important in retaining our focus and energy.
6. Know when to follow. Being Gung-Ho is commendable, as is wanting to be a leader. But, the truth is we don’t need to push our way to the front of the pack. By learning to follow, we learn how to lead. Let yourself be last, be a learner, and be slow.
7. Trying to push through life simply doesn’t feel very good. It is like driving as fast as you can to hurry up and get home to relax. By the time you get home, you are a stress case and you feel awful- it simply doesn’t work. When you find yourself trying too hard, or fighting the forces of nature (or gravity) remember one thing: it’s ok to let go and come down. You’ve already touched the ring.

It is said in Thailand that “Climbing gives you Power” my hope is that this article will have the same affect on you.

My true love is travel.  I LOVE TO TRAVEL!! I started traveling before I can even remember.  We had a condo in Florida when I was growing up in Indiana and we would split the year between warm Indiana and cool beachy Florida.  My brother and I flew by ourselves between the two when I was seven.  I bought my first plane ticket when I was twelve.  I flew to Canada.  My next trip I saved for was New York City… and I was hooked.  Since then, I have led adventure trips all over the US, moved to Australia, Hawaii, Colorado and California.  I’ve traveled to scuba dive and climb in Thailand, snorkeled in the Bahamas, and toured and explored Italy twice.  I’ve dined at the finest restaurants from Vancouver to world class dining in London.  I’ve skied with the stars in Park City, Utah and camped on remote beaches to swim with the sea turtles.

The thing is, it doesn’t really matter where I am going.  I love to fly.  I love everything about it (well, except security checks).  I love packing.  I am one of those nuts that has everything packed and zipped up days before a trip.  I can’t even wait! I love going to the airport.  I love getting my e-ticket.  I love wondering who I will meet on the plane (and have made several new BFF’s just by sitting next to them for one trip).  But, my favorite part of flying is thinking about whatever local drama I’m involved in when I’m leaving the airport and as the plane taxies down the runway and begins to take flight, it all disappears like little bits of wispy clouds we part through.  My mind becomes calm, and I look out over the sea of clouds and see the beautiful sun and know, sometimes for the first time in years, that everything is going to be alright.

I get calm, and then I get excited for the journey and the destination.  I regain my SENSE OF SELF and I am finally able to drop any attachment to the world below and I let myself fly through imagination land where the sun is always shining above the clouds.

To me, travel is magical.  I am so alive when I go somewhere new.  I talk to strangers, ask people where to eat, and learn from the locals what I should do.  I try new food.  I fill my senses with new sights, smells, and people watching.  I feast on the art of life and try to soak it into every single pore of my very being, right into my soul.  I love every second of it.  Yes, moments come where I am confused, or lost, or dismayed, but then someone rides by on a unicycle and I burst out in laughter.  Or, a gorgeous Italian man says, “How can I help you, bella?” and my world is suddenly right.

The things that get me down when I am home melt away.  Suddenly, I have more than enough to wear, more than enough money, great hair, and perfect skin.  I think I must just float around glowing, for the most part.  I love it so much I want to stop time and just run around kissing everybody and thank them just for showing up on the street at the same time so I could have this moment of pure bliss.

The only problem that the traveler lifestyle poses is how to make a living while constantly on the go.  After a series of creative positions, I came to the conclusion that I needed a long-term solution for living the lifestyle I wanted to live.  My goal was to figure out how to help others, create multiple streams of income, and simultaneously work from anywhere in the world.  After years of reading hundreds of books on business, philosophy, and passive income strategies, I began to put all the pieces together.  In 2006 I finished my MBA and started my business consulting practice.  I created a “Sustainable Growth Model” that shows business owners how to put your business on virtual auto-pilot and exit to the lifestyle of your dreams.

After more than two years, I realized that my best clients were motivated by the same thing that I am:  freedom.  I also realized that there are those that have the same wanderlust spirit that I do, and they want to figure this out fast, so they can fund their freedom.  These wonderful people are excited about helping others and they realize that if it is done systematically—it doesn’t have to take all day!

The niche of the ‘Business Backpacker’ was formed.  These are my people.  They have been looking for solutions to their quandary of helping others and helping themselves all around the world.  They are interested in adventure and focus on freedom.  They love the ideas and opportunity that life has to offer and want to work on learning more and sharing it with others.  These lifestyle specialists are smart, savvy, educated entrepreneurs that want to live life unconventionally—they want to LIVE MORE AND WORK LESS.  And my favorite part of it all is that I get to help great people like YOU share your greatest gifts and give you the freedom to do what I love best:  Travel & Enjoy Life!!